The path to lemonade, part IX

I tell you, I better finish this path soon, otherwise I won't know the Roman numerals!

Same game, if you want to play catch up, or just re-read the entire thing (and excuse the punctuation/grammar errors I've just discovered), click back to the lemonade path and read from the bottom up.

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It didn't take me long to fit in to the detachment again. Although I admit it was weird being on the cadre side and to have an old cadre member's office as my own. As with tradition per Detachment 810, I was given the freshman class to teach along with the additional duty of recruiting officer (the youngest ranking officer usually got these duties as they were, in my opinion, the most time-consuming). It was a nice fit for me seeing as I already knew when the upcoming student events would take place and how to best utilize my time to maximize exposure. But first, I wanted to change the dang air force curriculum. According to my ROTC instructor training class, I could change the curriculum if I included all the necessary learning. And change I did. I made the class fun and educational. Edutainment was my goal because learning, especially at the university level, shouldn't be about regurgitation. I could teach the necessary curriculum and make it fun. I remember spending hours and days changing everything up and thinking the whole time that my second year at the detachment would be a breeze since I would already have everything - tests, quizzes, and my newly-designed classroom format - done. I administered tests via blackboard and uploaded helpful hints for my students to utilize the day prior to class. The secret was that I was learning the information days prior to my students and it was convenient that I uploaded my PowerPoint slides and notes the day prior to class...I honestly wasn't prepared until then.

I had not been at the detachment a six weeks when a notice came down from the air force saying they needed to reduce the overall force size due to the increasing costs of the war(s) (remember, this was 2005). The government needed to reallocate funding to the other service branches that were fighting more and it was determined that young officers were easier to expend. You see, if someone has been in the military for six years or more and congress has approved a "Force Shaping" (a.k.a. layoff), the government is required to give them a severance package (and a hefty one at that). If the individual hasn't been in that long, then no severance has to be offered. Targeting the overpopulated lieutenants solved two problems in one: reducing the force size and saving money. This notice also immediately halted all 2002-2003 graduates from moving from their current assignment until Force Shaping had taken place. The reason? Because it was your rater and senior rater who would be going to bat for you. You wouldn't be known as well in your new assignment. I later found out that functional managers were to have ceased moving lieutenants months prior to the official announcement and to not worry about finding assignments for them, rather focus their energy and time and effort on other ranks and deployment schedules. I guess I, "fell through the cracks." Right.

Certain grossly overpopulated career fields were targeted, but there was one field that was cutting more lieutenants than any other:

public affairs

I remember reading the announcement and seeing a list of career fields and percentages next to them. I honestly thought that it was the retention percentage until I saw "0%" next to all flying positions: pilot, navigator and air battle manager.

And that's when it hit me...

The air force was going to cut 73% of the lieutenants in public affairs. Almost three out of every four lieutenants in my career field were going to be let go.

And then something else hit me...

I had just moved to a new assignment and chose to career broaden outside of my skill set. I wasn't even a practicing public affairs officer! I was an instructor. In an ROTC program. In WACO of all places. With the nearest base three hours away in San Antonio.

And since the hits were coming...

The individual who was going to rate me was at Maxwell Air Force Base in Montgomery, Alabama and I had never even met him. And I never would.

And now for the punches below the belt...

Since it was "unfair" to count continued education as part of your retention, the air force was going to hide if a lieutenant had earned their master's degree. The one thing I knew I had above my peers, and arguably almost ALL of my peers, was the fact that I had my master's degree. The air force actually recommended officers wait until they were captains to start thinking about a master's degree. It was well-known that an officers chance for continued promotion was dependent on a few things: serving a remote tour, earning a master's degree, and with the current war situation, serve on a deployment. I had been on a deployment (although it was a POTUS - president of the United States - support deployment and not to a war zone) and I had my master's degree. But that wasn't going to count. Because it was unfair. Unfair to the other lieutenants who "didn't have the time" to work on a master's degree.

I have to admit that I was more than shocked, confused and angry at this point. Why had God opened up the ROTC job when my chances of staying in the air force were now slim to none? In my previous assignment, I was ranked in the top of the top lieutenants. Not that that alone would have retained me, but it gave me a much better shot. I had also gotten medically disqualified from a career field that was protected from Force Shaping. Had I not been diagnosed with keratoconus, I would be an air battle manager and not even be dealing with this mess.

To say my faith was rocked a bit is an understatement. I was angry at God. I didn't blame Him for what was happening but I was angry with the situation. Even writing all this down just now has hit me hard - and I know the final outcome! All I can say is that life isn't always "fair." Someone will always have something you want and you will always have something other people want. But for some reason, God chooses to say "no" to some of his most faithful children. He says "no, I have a better path for you, you just don't know it yet." I certainly didn't. My path to lemonade took 10 years to come full circle, and while that isn't huge amount of time, there were lots of hits along the way. There were times when I had to swallow the lump that formed in my throat and wipe away tears in my eyes and utter, "I trust you, Lord." Not that I truly believed it, but if I said it out loud I could follow in His path another day. Saying it out loud made it easier somehow.

So after a while, I picked up myself again and uttered, "I trust you, Lord. Show me...

Show me."